i'm an ebay stalker

i have succumbed to an all time low and need counseling. i am an ebay stalker. like many of those who have a propensity to horde and collect unscrupulous amounts of knickknacks and paddywacks, i too wheel and deal on the secondary free-market auction site known as ebay. not only do i shop around for savings on things i never knew i needed, i occasionally pawn unnecessary stuff off in order to buy more unnecessary stuff. it's a cycle... i'm well aware of it, but come on. we live in a capitalistic society and i fit perfectly into the irresponsible money-wasting post-college male demographic, so can you really blame me? if you answered yes... shut up. i wasn't really asking you anyway. what do you know? point is, ebay provides anyone, buyer, seller, and stranger alike, with a powerful feedback function that appeases to the curious voyeur in all of us. not only can you check-up on an individual's internet commerce trustworthiness, but you can also look into their buying habits... granted they are transactions made within 90 days. this leads into interesting reading.

case in point: bob (name changed for identity protection) is currently winning an my auction for a used copy of godzilla's revenge: all monsters attack on dvd. i'm not going into detail about how much of a sucker he is (who'd pay 1.99 + 3.00 s/h on this garbage when a better copy was recently released?), but instead am going to tell you what my cyber sleuthing has come up with.

• this gentleman wears size 34 jeans
• buys accessories for his android cell phone and ipod touch
• collects women's shoes? size 6.5 of course. what a creep.
• buys used godzilla dvds... well... just mine at least

this is some powerful stuff. then i think about the corporations that look into my credit card purchases to track my spending habits and subliminally rail me with targeted advertising. i always needed a fancy television shammy... jesus, i have a hard enough time coping with god knowing everything about me as it is.